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Vampire Dad Jokes

These vampire dad jokes really suck — in the best way possible. From fang puns to coffin wordplay, this collection is dying to make you laugh.

17 jokes

Why did the vampire read the newspaper?

What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman?

Why did Dracula take cold medicine?

How do vampires start their letters?

Why don't vampires have many friends?

What kind of dog does Dracula have?

Why do vampires always seem sick?

Why did the vampire get a job at the blood bank?

What do you call a vampire who bakes?

What do you call a vampire at a clearance sale?

What do you call a vampire in a snowstorm?

Why did the vampire subscribe to the newspaper?

Why did the vampire break up with his girlfriend?

Why did Dracula become a vegetarian?

What do vampires take for a sore throat?

Why did the vampire floss his teeth?

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The funniest vampire dad jokes play on suck, fang, coffin, and bat. They're fang-tastic and always have bite.

Vampire dad jokes are a Halloween staple! Perfect for costume parties, trick-or-treating, and vampire movie marathons.

Yes! Our vampire dad jokes are family-friendly and more funny than frightening. Kids love the fang-tastic wordplay.